home
Search the site:
search

Emotional Responses to Breast Cancer - Understanding the One You Love


Being diagnosed with breast cancer is a life-changing event. A torrent of feelings wash over the survivor. Suddenly, the world feels like an unsafe place. Little things seem unimportant to the survivor. And the big things, like life, seem tenuous. Knowing the emotional responses she is experiencing will help friends, family and fellow survivors support and nurture her, and each other. She needs to be encouraged to fully feel and express each of her feelings.

The most helpful thing you can do is "just stand there" while she goes through the range of emotions. Often we try to "fix" or stop the flow of feelings so we don't experience the pain and discomfort. But transformation and healing occur when feelings are felt and honored, not when they are repressed or denied.

Here are some emotions you might witness:

1. Shock and Disbelief

"There must be some mistake. It can't be happening to me! I'm healthy. I take care of myself!" Disbelief is one of the most prevalent first emotional responses.

2. Overwhelm

Breast cancer survivors are faced with many critical decisions. Often there is a time pressure to make treatment decisions. It helps to have support with research about traditional, alternative and complementary treatment options.

3. Fear

"Am I going to die? Will I be disfigured? Will you still love me? Will I love myself?" These are the major questions hovering in the dark recesses of the survivor's mind. It helps tremendously to bring them up for discussion.

4. Worry

"How sick will I be? Who will take care of the children? How will I deal with loss of income? Will I lose my job?" Once the first wave of personal survival questions are dealt with, these questions wear on the survivor's mind.

5. Anger

"Why me? I don't deserve this! I don't have time or money to deal with this!" Anger, if not expressed, is the most insidious of all emotions. In itself, repressed anger can create disease. Having a healthy outlet for these feelings needs to be part of the breast cancer patient's treatment program.

6. Resentment

" I'm not the one this should be happening to! I eat well, exercise, get mammograms, take vitamins! Why should I have to suffer with this disease!" Often there is no logical explanation for the onset of cancer. It's natural that feelings of resentment may arise.

7. Loneliness

"No one ever is here for me. I'm all alone. I have no friends I can count on. I feel so alone!" Even when family and friends are around to help, often survivors feel isolated and alone. They are unable to ask for the help they want and need.

8. Sadness

Sadness prevails when any loss is imminent. Tears may flow profusely as the loss of precious body parts is contemplated. The thought of further illness from chemo treatments may seem unbearable. She needs gentle comfort and frequent reassurance.

9. Misunderstood

She may feel that nobody is listening or really understands her. In actuality, no one else can really understand what she is going through. Every person's experience is unique. Honor her and her uniqueness. Give her space to express her feelings and thoughts.

10. Hopefulness

Seen as a learning opportunity, the breast cancer experience could create a feeling of hope for an entirely new and different life, one filled with passion, fulfillment, joy and love. Knowing that life is ongoing, and only the body dies, can give great comfort during this otherwise stressful time.

Copyright 2005 Dr. Talia Miller - The Breast Cancer Recovery Coach

Dr. Talia Miller, sought after breast cancer coach, author and trainer is a long-term breast cancer thriver. Her passion is to coach breast Cancer survivors so they can THRIVE! Contact her at t@BreastCancerCoach.com, or visit her website to arrange for a complimentary consultation.

She is the founding director of the Breast Cancer Support Center, a 501c3 non-profit specializing in utilizing the body-mind-spirit connection, and the outstanding healing program, "From Survivor to Thriver ─ The Breakthrough Program for Beating Breast Cancer?". The Center offers free educational seminars by PHONE on prevention and avoiding recurrence. Email Director@BreastCancerSupportCenter.org to register. Also available, personal retreats in Grass Valley, CA to help survivors become thrivers.


MORE RESOURCES:


BBC News

Free sports prostheses for breast cancer patients
BBC News
Head of Breast Cancer Care Cymru Linda McCarthy said a prosthesis can help improve women's confidence after surgery.
Free NHS prostheses for breast cancer patientsWalesOnline

all 2 news articles »


TopNews United States

An Increase in Breast Cancer Awareness Credited to Coronation Street Plotline
TopNews United States
Breast cancer awareness has been elevated and the storyline of the prime-time soap Coronation Street is being given the credit of the awareness drift. ...
Mainstream: Breast Cancer Awareness Basketball Gamesmy.hsj.org
Corrie raises breast cancer awarenessDigital Spy
Golden Eagles Raise $6000 in Support of Breast Cancer AwarenessGoMarquette.com
Grimsby Telegraph -Holy Soap (blog)
all 7 news articles »


Hockey game to benefit breast cancer research
TheChronicleHerald.ca
Organizers hope to raise $3500 to $4000 for breast cancer research. "It should be a lot of fun," said Rory Fraser, a sheriff's deputy at the Dartmouth ...



Dominica News Online

Komen grants help ease breast cancer's financial toll
Florida Weekly
FLORIDA WEEKLY FILE PHOTO When Leesa Crapa was diagnosed with breast cancer last summer, she felt immobilized by the threat of financial devastation. ...
Comic tour to fight breast cancer comes to BNBloomington Pantagraph
Breast cancer makes impact on Francesca's in NapervilleSuburban Life Publications
Dillard's breast cancer event ThursdayBowling Green Daily News
WZVN-TV -Third Sector -Sioux Falls Argus Leader
all 85 news articles »


Local hiker to climb Mt. Rainier for breast cancer fundraiser
Westseattleherald.com
David Town is showing his support for his wife, Lisa, who had breast cancer, by raising money to climb Mount Rainier for a Fred Hutchinson fund-raiser, ...



NYSUT.org

A glass act: Making Strides Against Breast Cancer
NYSUT.org
Caren Price displays some of her stained glass pink ribbons and angels designed to benefit Making Strides Against Breast Cancer, and hearts for the American ...



Effort Aims to Spike Breast Cancer With New Approach
PR Newswire (press release)
SCOTTSDALE, Ariz., March 11 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- Many women live with breast cancer that does not respond to standard medical treatment, ...
Lazio would make breast cancer detection top priorityNewsday (subscription)
Max Organises 'Breast Cancer Support Group Meeting'Express Healthcare (blog)
Mammogram Must HavesWSOC Charlotte
Chicago Breaking News - Tribune -Providence Journal -PRLog.Org (press release)
all 33 news articles »


Turning breast cancer focus to prevention
Gloucester Daily Times
Last year, a research team in Seattle found that women taking this popular drug that helps block a recurrence of estrogen-positive breast cancer had become ...

and more »


Johnson Honors Breast Cancer Hotline Head
Garden City News
Hillary Rutter, Executive Director of the Garden City-based Adelphi NY Breast Cancer Hotline and Support Program, with Senator Craig M. Johnson Hillary ...


Google News